DOT 27 : COMMOTION

Daniel (7+ years old) 

Tuesday, November 12, 2002

 

Deep sobs racked her body ...

as she let her guard down and allowed herself to be consumed by an overwhelming wave of emotions that threatened to suffocate her and leave her lungs gasping for air. 

Dropping to her knees, she cried her heart out and wept as if her life depended on it.

For all mothers out there with children who are living with brain tumors or have gone to Heaven because of that, 

those tears that morning ... 

she swore solemnly ...

were shed for you ...

Shortly after regaining her composure, Mom came out of the bathroom quietly. Feeling embarrassed with her flushed appearance and tear-stained face, she slipped out of the room, unnoticed, for some fresh air.

Outside, there was a small commotion with a little girl who was wailing loudly. She was about your age, clinging to her mommy, screaming her lungs out and looking absolutely terrified. 

 

When the oceans rise and thunders roar ...

I will soar with You above the storm ...

Father, You are King over the flood ...

I will be still and know You are GOD ...

 

 STILL

 Hillsong lyrics.

DOT 26 : BOTAK

Daniel (7+ years old) 

Tuesday, November 12, 2002

On the morning of the surgery ...

Mom suggested that You send a text message to your aunts who were studying in Russia at the time. 

Both your aunts, Diana and Carol, have been texting back and forth, and forth and back, from the day You were diagnosed with that ... 

that ... 

bit of water in your head.

You took Mom’s phone eagerly, and started to key in your message with much enthusiasm. 

Your mother stood by your bed, and watched You.

In less than a minute, You handed the phone back and said, "Okay, done!" 

Mom could not help but take a peek at what You had written :

“Dey r going 2 shave my head. 

Wil u stil love me wen I m botak (bald)?”

The innocent message was totally unexpected, and it caught Mom by surprise. Hot tears instantly stung her eyes, and threatened to trickle down her cheeks. 

Turning away abruptly and stepping into the washroom for immediate privacy, she closed the door. Leaning heavily against it, her head tilted back, she found herself breathing hard. 

Before long, all the pent-up feelings that had been carefully locked within her the last few days, came crashing out of control. 

 

So tell me now and I won't ask again ...

Will You still love me tomorrow ... <3

 

WILL YOU STILL LOVE ME TOMORROW 

By American Idol 2011 James Durbin.

 

 WILL YOU STILL LOVE ME TOMORROW

By Shirelles.

DOT 25 : REACTION

Daniel (7+ years old) 

Saturday, November 9, 2002

 

Mom heaved a sigh of relief. 

Excitement, elation and having something exhilarating to look forward to...

That was the reaction she wanted You to have. It was important that You do not think, not even for a moment, about the surgery. 

At all. 

Not that You were even thinking about it. 

You weren't ... but just in case.

“Now, go thank Dad,” Mom said, following the both of You as You two ran to Dad in the living room. 

Mom threw Dad a look of guilt, which was quickly replaced by a victorious smirk. 

“I told Daniel You’d be buying him a PS2,” Mom announced slowly, with a please-play-along wink, nailing Dad on the spot. 

Watching You both fling your hands around Dad, and yelling, “Thank’s Dad,” Mom’s chest contracted painfully.

You... 

You must never know ... 

 

Ain't about how fast I get there

 Ain't about what's waiting on the other side

It's the climb ...

 THE CLIMB

By Miley Cyrus.

DOT 24 : GAME

Daniel (7+ years old) 

Saturday, November 9, 2002

 

“Well, when - you - open - your - eyes,’’ 

Mom repeated slowly to create a higher level of suspense and to give her some time as she racked her brains for a suitable reply, 

“You will see a big box that says ...” 

What was the latest game that You wanted? 

Of course...

You were all wide eyed, and almost holding your breath at that point.

Mom mouthed the words clearly, “Play-Station-Two.”

You gave a yelp of excitement! 

The expression that radiated from your face at that moment was priceless. 

“Pee - Ass - Two???” 

You squealed at the top of your voice. 

“Justine, PS2!” 

The look You shot your sister was one of pure delight. The both of You started dancing around and chanting, 

PS2, PS2, PS2 ...

 

 I'll rise up like the eagle ...

POWER OF LOVE

 

DOT 23 : FLUID

Daniel (7+ years old) 

Saturday, November 9, 2002

 

“Flu-ee? What’s flu-ee?” 

You asked innocently, as You continued to position the Pokemon figurines in a battle line.

“Flu-iddd,” Mom repeated, as she emphasised the ending sound of the alphabet “D” clearly. 

“Flu-id-the...” You repeated obediently, as You continued to play with the lil toys on your bed. 

“What’s flu-id-the?” You asked again, your concentration fixed on your little figurines. 

Your lack of interest was obvious. 

“Fluid just means water,” Mom said. 

“There is a teeny-weeny bit of water in your head, and we need to get it out, so it won’t hurt You anymore,” Mom said. 

“We are going to the hospital on Monday, and the next day, You will go for an operation,” Mom paused. 

“You won’t feel anything. You will be asleep the whole time. The doctor will put a straw in and just suck the water out, okay?” Mom explained in her own version.

“Okay,” You replied simply. 

Your monosyllable answer reflected your lack of excitement. 

Deciding to spur things up a notch, Mom said brightly, “When You open your eyes after the surgery, guess what???” 

That did it. 

You spun around immediately. 

Your mother got your attention alright. 

“What?” You both echoed together. 

 

Sleeping like an angel ... :D

 

 ANGEL OF THE MORNING

The Pretenders.

 

DOT 22 : POKEMON

Daniel (7+ years old) 

Saturday, November 9, 2002

 

“So, what do you think?” 

Mom asked, turning to look at Dad. We were in the car, on the way home.

Dad allowed his hands to grip the steering wheel momentarily. He inhaled deeply, before relaxing his hold, and letting out a long breath. 

“I've a good feeling about him (the doctor),” Dad said finally. 

Mom smiled happily, “Yeah, me too.” 

We drove on in silence. 

Dad and Mom were both deep in our own thoughts. So much needed to be said. Yet, the sound of silence was strangely comforting to us at that moment.

Back home in your room... 

Justine and You were playing with your Pokemon characters. Mom has always wondered how the both of You could remember all the 450 over comic-characters by individual names. 

You were so engrossed in your Pokemon world, that Mom had to clap her hands to get your attention. 

Sinking down to your bed, Mom said, 

“Daniel, Mom has good news. You know the headaches that You’ve been getting... Well, it turns out that there is some fluid in your head...”

 

A water baby since birth ...

 

SOMEBODY TO LOVE

By Queen.

DOT 21 : CYST

Daniel (7+ years old)

Saturday, November 9, 2002

 

Mom’s mouth fell open to shape a big O. 

She drew in a deep breath. 

Did she hear right? Did the doctor say - cyst? 

A tumor - cyst? 

“And that, Ladies & Gentlemen, is my big sign,” 

Mom made a triumphant announcement to an imaginary audience. 

It made a whole lot of difference that the doctor did not once mention the bad C word. 

Just cyst. Yeah, cyst. Good ole’ cyst. 

The better C word, she thought.

Sure, we can handle cyst.

Like ...

What have You got? Oh, it's nothing - just a cyst...

The doctor pointed to the scan, and added, 

“If I had to have a tumor in my brain, that is where I would want it to be. It’s in a perfect location.” 

Mom exclaimed inwardly, Daniel’s scan is PERFECT??? 

The cyst is in a perfect location?

Why, we’ve found our doctor, your mother mentally hugged herself in glee, throwing a quick glance at Dad. Since the day of diagnosis and prognosis, your parents have not felt so relieved and happy as at that moment. 

Upon the neurosurgeon’s advice, we agreed to admit You on the earliest day possible, which was, Monday, November 11, 2002. 

The surgery was to be scheduled the following day.

 Life seemed wonderful at that moment ...

 WONDERFUL LIFE

By Lara Fabian.

DOT 20 : WEEPING

Daniel (7+ years old)

Saturday, November 9, 2002

 

Upon first impression, Mom was taken in by the doctor's kind face. 

It really was comforting to talk to a specialist who was patient and compassionate, and took the time to answer all our questions. 

He did not hurry us, as a result of which, we spent two solid hours with him. Mom also had the chance to observe his hands, and was happy to note that they were pretty steady. 

Yes, she checked his hands.

“This is a weeping tumor,” the doctor said. 

A weeping tumor? 

What has the tumor got to weep about, Mom frowned in distaste. 

Crankily, she bit out, “I thought we are the ones who are weeping.” 

The doctor gave Mom a wry smile. 

Picking up the scan, he explained further, 

“You see the fluid that is surrounding the tumor mass? That’s water. That’s why we say the tumor is weeping. This is a tumor cyst.”

A tumor cyst …

 

I won't let anybody hurt You, bro ... I'll stand by You ... <3
 

 

I'll Stand By You 

By The Pretenders. 

 Click on the title to view video.

DOT 19 : NEUROSURGEON

Daniel (7+ years old)

Saturday, November 9, 2002

 

“How did You get these names?” Mom asked curiously. 

“My brother made some calls,” Dad retorted impatiently. 

“In fact, that first one is the top neurosurgeon in the country,” Dad’s voice resonated with respect. 

Mom said nothing. 

“We can see both, and decide who to engage later,” suggested Dad finally. 

Mom thought that was a good idea. Dad called the hospital and made the appointments. The first date was on that Saturday afternoon with the actor, and the second, on the following Monday morning with the tailor.

So there we were, standing right outside the neurosurgeon’s room… in hesitation. 

Dear God, if this is the doctor You choose for Daniel, please give us a sign, Mom voiced silently to herself. 

Despite the frightening situation we were facing, Dad and Mom managed to stay calm, like we knew what we were doing, when in actual fact, we had not the faintest idea. 

A higher Hand was to guide us through this challenge, as we learned later.

 

Let's pray ...

GOD is in control. He's watching from a distance ...

FROM A DISTANCE

By Bette Midler.

Click on the title to view.

 

DOT 18 : ACTOR

Daniel (7+ years old) 

Saturday, November 9, 2002

Dad and Mom walked towards the light.

"That must be the consultation room," Dad said. 

The door was ajar, and bright lights streamed out of the room into the dimly-lit reception area. It was after office hours on a Saturday afternoon. 

The time was 4:30 pm. The neurosurgeon had very kindly made an exception to see us after his normal consultation hours.

At home earlier, two days ago on Thursday …

Dad said, 

“I have the names of two doctors we could see. 

Both are from Sunway Hospital.” 

He held out a piece of paper with some scribbles on it. Mom took the paper and read their names out aloud. 

Glancing slowly at Dad, Mom remarked doubtfully, 

“Are You sure they are neurosurgeons? The first person sounds like a tailor,” Mom expressed uncertainly...

“and the second one,” she paused, “how sure are You he’s not a part-time actor or something?” 

The first name had the word FOO, which means trousers in the Chinese dialect, and the second name was RICHARD-something. 

Like - Gere?

“They are both very highly recommended,” drawled Dad in their defence, dismissing Mom’s childish comment. 

 

The doctor God prepared to take care of You was somewhere out there. 

He would soon give us a sign.

 

 SOMEWHERE OUT THERE

By 4y old Kaitlyn Maher on America's Got Talent.

Click on the title to view video.

DOT 17 : SURVIVAL

Daniel (7+ years old)

Wednesday, November 6, 2002

 

At home ... 

You went straight to your toy cabinet. 

You were excited to be home. Justine and You were soon busy constructing a railway track with your Lego train set, both of you sprawled happily on the carpet, and playing together.

Dad went straight to the kitchen and made himself a cup of strong coffee. 

Seated himself before the computer, Dad spent many hours researching and researching some more for information on the naughty cell, the symptoms, the treatments, the prognosis etc. 

It was past midnight, when Mom asked Dad, 

“So, what have You found?” 

Dad’s expression was one of sheer grimness. 

He gave Mom a weary look and said nothing. 

Peering over Dad’s shoulders, Mom pointed to the bold heading that was on the computer screen at that moment, and read aloud, 

“Survival Rate of ...” 

Dad immediately intercepted, bringing up his hands to shield the screen. 

Dad said, “Don’t read...” 

Mom began to protest, and tried to move Dad's hands away from the screen.

Refusing to budge, Dad repeated firmly, 

“Don’t - read - this!”

 

 

Listen up Bro ... so here's the plan ...

Any way the wind blows, we're gonna be okay ...

 Bohemian Rhapsody

By Vocal Adrenaline (GLEE) 

 

Click on the title to view video.

 

DOT 16 : ENVELOPE

Daniel (7+ years old)

November 6, 2002

Handing the letter to Mom, 

the doctor looked her straight in the eyes and said, 

“I’ve given Daniel my best care the past two days…” 

Mom returned his look unflinchingly, as she heard herself responding,

“Yes, yes, I know, I know that...

Our family will always be grateful to You for all that You have done for him here... 

Thank You.” 

Accepting the envelope with humble hands, we silently parted on the professional understanding that the patient has every right to a second opinion. 

Dad and Justine arrived a short while later. 

Mom waved the letter in Dad’s face and said, 

“Let’s settle the bill and get out of here.”

 

Get me outta here, Jus ...

 

A WHOLE NEW WORLD

From the Disney Cartoon Aladdin. 

 

Click on the title to view video.

DOT 15 : INSANITY

Daniel (7+ years old)

November 6, 2002

 

The doctor explained, with trying patience... 

that there were children younger than You who managed well with their (hospital's) MRI machines, and that he had never, ever, come across any complaints about loud and noisy scan machines that frightened children, in his entire medical practice. 

Those words of assurance floated in midair, and rested on deaf ears. 

Mom was not listening. 

The critical point was clear. 

Your doctor did not see eye to eye with your parents. It was not his fault, but it would have been pure insanity on our part to continue to engage him as your personal doctor under those circumstances.

The doctor had no choice. 

Mom had made up her mind, and was fiercely adamant about the transfer. Besides, he was not able to alleviate your mother's fears. 

He finally relented, and agreed to discharge You with some medication for nausea, edema and prevention of fits. 

He was nice though, to include a Letter of Recommendation addressed to Sunway Medical Center, for You to do the MRI there. 

Everything was going smoothly. 

The Holy Spirit is definitely with us.

 

At your favourite place in the whole wide world, the pool side. :D 

See the determination to climb every mountain ...

 

CLiMB EVERY MOUNTAiN

By Idol Netherlands 2008, Nikki Kerkhof. 

Click on title to view video.

DOT 14 : NONSENSE

Daniel (7+ years old) 

November 6, 2002
 

The next morning, the doctor came to your room. 

“We’ll be sending Daniel for an MRI later in the morning,” the doctor began. 

You were still sleeping like a baby. 

Mom took a deep breath, and mentally prepared herself for the drama-role she was about to play.

“You know doctor, I was thinking...” 

Mom said slowly, before continuing,

"Is it okay if Daniel did the MRI in Sunway Hospital?” 

The doctor raised an eye-brow. 

Mom continued steadily, 

“My friend works in Sunway and she tells me that the hospital has a new MRI machine which is child-friendly. Their machine has music to entertain the child during the scan.” 

Your mother paused, before explaining further, 

“The MRI machine in this hospital is old, and is very loud and noisy. I’m afraid it might frighten my son. He’s only a little boy and I don’t want him traumatized any more than he has to.”

Mom could tell that this was probably the first time the doctor has come across such unbelievable nonsense. 

He was not at all impressed with her reason for a transfer. 

 

I wanna hold your hand ...

I Want To Hold Your Hand

By Kurt from GLEE.

 

Click on title to view video.