DOT 183 : STEPS

THE FINAL CHAPTER : A SPIRITUAL JOURNEY (Sept 2009 to Jan 2010)

At the Grotto of Our Immaculate Conception, in Lourdes   

Daniel (14+ years old) (Wednesday 23/9/2009) 

Day 14 in Lourdes

NOVENA DAY 6

 

The Marian Procession ended about half an hour later. 

As the crowd began to disperse, Mom stood by the entrance steps to wait for Dad and You to come to her. That was the plan. 

Dad had said earlier, "Wait for us by the steps ..." 

It would have been quite impossible for her to go looking for the both of you in that large crowd. 

A while later, Mom spotted You at short distance. 

Her heart skipped a beat as she saw You walking up the steps towards her direction. Your mother was so surprised to see You on your feet. 

She had expected Dad to take You by wheelchair. 

You were holding your candle in one hand, and You had waved to your mother with the other. 

It was almost 10 pm by the time we met up. You would have been on your feet for more than an hour since Dad and You would have walked there before 9 pm.

You appeared all happy and smiley. 

Dad said, You guys had bumped into one of the hospitaliers and he had exclaimed his surprise to see You walking at the procession since the last few times he saw You at the bath, You were laying horizontally on the stretcher, and were not able to get up.

Things could not have looked better.

 

See here ...

DOT 182 : ROSARY

THE FINAL CHAPTER : A SPIRITUAL JOURNEY (Sept 2009 to Jan 2010)

At the Grotto of Our Immaculate Conception, in Lourdes   

Daniel (14+ years old) (Wednesday 23/9/2009) 

Day 14 in Lourdes

NOVENA DAY 6

 

Mom could not concentrate on the Hail Marys after that.

Her head was spinning as all kinds of thoughts flashed across her mind, one after another. 

Her rosary broke. 

Was that some kind of sign? 

Was something about to happen? 

She would not have panicked except that she was instantly reminded with a jolting horror that Grandma had mentioned her rosary broke a few weeks, or months, does it matter, before Grandpa died.

Stop it!

Stop it!

STOP IT !!! 

Her head screeched.

JUST STOP IT! This will not do. 

She had no time for negative thoughts. Quickly, she dismissed her fears and assured herself that this time was different. The chain had gotten loose, that's all. She would ask Dad to fix it. There was nothing more to that. 

She did quietly wonder though, whether there was anyone... 

anyone at all ... 

among the sea of pilgrims before her that night, whose rosary broke too.

Or was it just hers?

 

The Rosary Basilica ...

DOT 181 : MARIA

THE FINAL CHAPTER : A SPIRITUAL JOURNEY (Sept 2009 to Jan 2010)

At the Grotto of Our Immaculate Conception, in Lourdes   

Daniel (14+ years old) (Wednesday 23/9/2009) 

Day 14 in Lourdes

NOVENA DAY 6

 

Mom recognized a young boy, probably in his late teens, who appeared to be leading the choir. He was one of the Altar Servers during the Holy Masses, and we have all heard him sing. 

Including You. Each time he opened his mouth to sing, we would turn to look at each other with our mouths dramatically opened. :D

His vocals were so rich, so pure, so powerful and so angelic, your mother stood in awe listening to him.

A mesmerizing experience ... always.

When the boy took the mike and started to sing the Ave Maria, he could have easily brought Simon Cowell to his knees. His voice had a way of piercing through your soul.

Mom felt like crying, listening to him. 

After the entrance hymn, it was time to meditate the Rosary. The pilgrims were holding their rosaries in their hands. 

Mom reached into her pocket to pull out hers. 

To her horror, her rosary chain snapped. She stood there, in the middle position of the second row of the choir team, her rosary ends dangling in her hands.

Sophia leaned over and whispered, 

"What happened to your rosary?"

"I don't know, it broke," Mom mumbled, clumsily stuffing the rosary back into her jeans.

 

 Here You are, with your candle and rosary given by the Red Indian man.

DOT 180 : FLAME

THE FINAL CHAPTER : A SPIRITUAL JOURNEY (Sept 2009 to Jan 2010)

At the Grotto of Our Immaculate Conception, in Lourdes   

Daniel (14+ years old) (Wednesday 23/9/2009) 

Day 14 in Lourdes

NOVENA DAY 6

 

At about 8:15 pm, Mom left the hotel to meet up with Sophia. 

Dad and You would go later to the Rosary Square to participate in the candle light procession at 9 pm. 

There were about fifty people in the choir. 

We stood at the entrance of the Basilica, overlooking a wide space that would soon be filled with pilgrims with dancing candle lights. 

The crowd started to trickle in at the time when Mom got there.

By 9 pm, the crowd poured in - literally.

The night was very dark, and everyone was holding lit candles. 

From where Mom was standing at the choir, the view was absolutely breathtaking. She could stand there and just enjoy the spectacular moment - forever. 

A never-ending ocean of flickering flame from the first row of pilgrims, right to the very end. You could not see the end. It was just so very far away. 

Dad and You were somewhere in the crowd. 

 

 A sea of flickering lights lit up the dark night.

DOT 179 : CHOIR

THE FINAL CHAPTER : A SPIRITUAL JOURNEY (Sept 2009 to Jan 2010)

At the Grotto of Our Immaculate Conception, in Lourdes   

Daniel (14+ years old) (Wednesday 23/9/2009) 

Day 14 in Lourdes

NOVENA DAY 6

 

We took the carriage out today.

As we would be spending quite a bit of time at the grotto after the 2 pm bath, it would be more comfortable for You to be able to rest and lay down on the carriage later. Going for daily baths was a routine, as well as participating in the Blessed Sacrament Procession at 5 pm and celebrating Holy Mass at 6 pm.

That day, at the indoor stadium while attending the Blessed Sacrament celebration, Sophia the Korean girl, came over to say hello. 

She asked You how You were, and You gave her a wide smile and said "Good." 

After exchanging some small talk with You, she turned to Mom and invited your mother to join the choir that night at the Rosary Basilica during the Candle Light Marian's Procession at 9 pm.

Mom wondered if that could be a sign from Our Lady to serve Her in some way. 

Without hesitation, your mother said okay, and agreed to meet Sophia at the entrance of the Basilica at 8:30 pm. 

By the time we got back to the hotel that evening, it was about 7:30 pm. 

We went straight to the dining hall to have our dinner. This evening, You were well enough to sit with us for dinner. Aunt Laura was there, and she was very happy to see You. We had broccoli soup, spaghetti with zucchini in tomato sauce. You slurped up your pasta noodles and thoroughly enjoyed the meal.

 

Here's the choir people, practising before the procession started.

DOT 178 : SOAP

THE FINAL CHAPTER : A SPIRITUAL JOURNEY (Sept 2009 to Jan 2010)

At the Grotto of Our Immaculate Conception, in Lourdes   

Daniel (14+ years old) (Wednesday 23/9/2009) 

Day 14 in Lourdes

NOVENA DAY 6

 

A sudden yelp interrupted her thoughts and made her jumped. 

Hearing some scrambling noises in the shower tub, along with muffled sounds, Mom instinctively raised her voice with concern as she called out, 

"Daniel, are You okay? Why are You making so much noise?"

You answered back loudly, "I DRoPPED THe SoaP ..."

That solemn tone drew a smile from her. Rolling her eyes at your rather endearing clumsiness, your mother remarked through the door, 

"Don't make so much noise, You're disturbing the other guests."

"OKaY MoMMM ..." You drawled loudly again, before You broke into a song.

Mom had to smile. 

You were in a cheery mood, and God knows You deserved to be. You felt good today, and it showed. Oh, today was just going to be so perfect. She could feel it already. Make all the noise You want, Son ... she thought, smiling to herself, as she went through the closet to pick up some clothes for You. 

On hindsight, had anybody told Mom then that her son would soon DIE in 4 months' time, she would have struck them down senseless!

 

 In IKEA (Dec, 2008) ...

 

 

 I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU

connie talbot

DOT 177 : SHOWER

THE FINAL CHAPTER : A SPIRITUAL JOURNEY (Sept 2009 to Jan 2010)

At the Grotto of Our Immaculate Conception, in Lourdes   

Daniel (14+ years old) (Wednesday 23/9/2009) 

Day 14 in Lourdes

NOVENA DAY 6

 

It was 10:30 am.

You were taking a shower. You had just finished your breakfast in bed. The usual tub of yoghurt, croissant with butter and jam, and a fruit. It was always a joy to prepare food for You as You always greet your meals with a fresh enthusiasm. 

Dad has often commented that all your maids loved cooking for You because of your deep, somewhat child-like appreciation for all kinds of food.

After breakfast, Mom brought your tray downstairs to the dining hall. When she went back to the room, You were not in bed. How surprised she was to find that You were in the bathroom.

Leaning her head against the bathroom door, Mom called out, "Daniel, You okay?"

You answered loudly, "i'M TaKING MY SHoWeR, MoMMM ..."

Mom found herself smiling at the closed door. 

Standing there, she strained to listen to the sounds that were coming out of the bathroom. The mere sound of water hitting against the shower screen was just - heavenly. When You started to sing noisily, she could not help but chuckle to herself. 

Retreating back to sit by the bed, she listened to all the noises that were coming from the bathroom, thanking God with a grateful heart.

 

 

In church ... (February, 2008)

DOT 176 : BETTER

THE FINAL CHAPTER : A SPIRITUAL JOURNEY (Sept 2009 to Jan 2010)

At the Grotto of Our Immaculate Conception, in Lourdes   

Daniel (14+ years old) (Tuesday 22/9/2009) 

Day 13 in Lourdes

NOVENA DAY 5

 

That night, as Mom sat by your bedside, You said rather thoughtfully, "I feel much better today."

Hearing that, hot tears instantly sprang painfully in your mother's eyes as she felt an immediate surge of an overwhelming sense of relief and gratitude filling every microscopic nerve cells in her body, mind and soul. 

Switching off the bedside lights as casually as she could, as the last thing she wanted was to have You see tears cascading down your mother's face, she bent down to give You a goodnight peck on the cheek before telling You very firmly, 

"You're gonna get better and better every day, Daniel. God loves You very, very much." 

The dim lights that streamed in through the window from outside, revealed a contented smile on your beautiful face.

I feel much better today ...

Holding those precious words firmly in her heart with the intention of never letting them go, she found herself hearing You repeat them, in her head that night in bed, over and over and over again, until she fell asleep. 

Dad was checking emails in the lounge downstairs and she did not hear him come into the room later.

Both Mom and You were fast asleep.

 

 At Kuantan Beach during Chinese New Year (2009).

Justine took this picture of Mom, You and Dad.

 

 

 

DOT 175 : MEDALLION

THE FINAL CHAPTER : A SPIRITUAL JOURNEY (Sept 2009 to Jan 2010)

At the Grotto of Our Immaculate Conception, in Lourdes   

Daniel (14+ years old) (Tuesday 22/9/2009) 

Day 13 in Lourdes

NOVENA DAY 5

 

We stopped walking.

The man quickly turned around as we watched him run up to a Priest. He seemed to be asking the Priest to bless something he brought out from his pocket, before he hurried back to You. 

At your side, he presented a little bookmark with Our Lady's medallion and conveyed a message in French. We could only capture the word "Mary" from the string of French words he uttered to You. 

You gave him a bright smile before accepting the little gift with both hands, and said, "Thank You." 

Dad and Mom noticed You refrained from saying "Thank You, Uncle" this time, as the previous time You did, your parents had teased You about it.

From there, we went straight to the main Rosary Basilica to attend Holy Mass at 6 pm.

After Mass, we strolled leisurely back to the hotel, pushing You in the wheelchair, enjoying the crisp cool air.

That evening, we had a nice dinner of wild rice with grilled fish, braised broccoli, and pumpkin soup. We ate at the dining room. You loved the broccoli dish, all soft and mushy, but very tasty with the sweet onions. 

You asked Mom to get the recipe from Aunty Laura, which she did.

 

 Justine and You in front of the Rosary Basilica on 11/9/2009, 

our 2nd day at the grotto.

 

DOT 174 : PAGES

THE FINAL CHAPTER : A SPIRITUAL JOURNEY (Sept 2009 to Jan 2010)

At the Grotto of Our Immaculate Conception, in Lourdes   

Daniel (14+ years old) (Tuesday 22/9/2009) 

Day 13 in Lourdes

NOVENA DAY 5

 

"Here Son, I got You something ..."

Back in the hotel room, Mom presented the book she bought for You. You eagerly grabbed it and started flipping through the pages with the enthusiasm of a child. 

You read aloud the captions that followed each illustration. Listening to You with a smile on her face, Mom tidied the room up a litle. 

At one point, she had handed You a banana and a peach, and some other fruits that Dad had bought from a nearby grocer. Before long, You were chomping and reading with your mouthful. 

Like so very normal.

You were careful not to stain your new book, so You held the book up high with one hand, while holding the fruit in the other, laying on the bed, with your head and upper back, propped up by two bulky pillows.

At 4:30 pm, Dad and Mom wheeled You out again.

We went to the underground basilica. 

After participating in the Blessed Sacrament procession and celebrating the international mass, while leaving the stadium, a man came running to our direction, and said hastily with hand gestures, we assumed he was trying to say, 

"Wait, don't go yet (in French) ..."

 

The Blessed Sacrament Procession.

DOT 173 : PICTURES

THE FINAL CHAPTER : A SPIRITUAL JOURNEY (Sept 2009 to Jan 2010)

At the Grotto of Our Immaculate Conception, in Lourdes   

Daniel (14+ years old) (Tuesday 22/9/2009) 

Day 13 in Lourdes

NOVENA DAY 5

 

It would be more fun, for Mom and You to look at pictures and read easy sentences together, in the hope of understanding the Mysteries of the Rosary better, than to get thick, serious - looking "True Story" books which might end up long and boring. 

Mom could imagine your dramatic frown if she were to present You with a big, fat book, with no pictures, especially when You have always been so into comics, since You were a child.

Mom recalled with a wry smile, a time when Aunt Jessie in the States, sent Justine and You a Harry Potter novel each. You had wasted no time to flip the book from front to back, and back to front, before voicing your surprise, 

"There are no pictures here ..."

Despite that, Mom tried to encourage You to read the novel, but You never did quite get pass page one.

Sighing with nostalgia, Mom walked over to the counter with the new book. Pulling out some euro notes, your mother paid the cashier. Then, she hurried back to the hotel.

It was almost 4 pm.

 

Picture taken in June 2007 during term break.

DOT 172 : BOOKS

THE FINAL CHAPTER : A SPIRITUAL JOURNEY (Sept 2009 to Jan 2010)

At the Grotto of Our Immaculate Conception, in Lourdes   

Daniel (14+ years old) (Tuesday 22/9/2009) 

Day 13 in Lourdes

NOVENA DAY 5

 

No, she was not going to need those ...

Mom thought grimly, as she found herself returning the few books that she had selected for comparison before purchase, back to their respective shelves. 

Now was not the time to buy thick books with lots of words. If ever she needs to check up on the story of Bernadette, she would just do so on the internet. She was not going to buy a book where the ending was not to her benefit. 

Even if it were a true story.

Rubbing her cold hands together, she walked aimlessly and in a state of a stupor, to another segment of the store. Stopping by the children's corner, her sombre mood was instantly lifted by the vibrant and colorful books that were on display. 

There is just something about little children, she mused as she reached out for a book. 

Even God loves little children and they have a special place in His heart.

Mom finally decided to buy You a simple hard cover book entitled, The Rosary, that consisted of beautiful drawings and illustrations, along with simple prayers printed in cute fonts. 

 

 Taken in November 2008. We were at Uncle S's waterfall resort. 

You were recuperating from your 4th surgery.

 

DOT 171 : HOPE

THE FINAL CHAPTER : A SPIRITUAL JOURNEY (Sept 2009 to Jan 2010)

At the Grotto of Our Immaculate Conception, in Lourdes   

Daniel (14+ years old) (Tuesday 22/9/2009) 

Day 13 in Lourdes

NOVENA DAY 5

 

Then again, each of us have a different purpose in life, Mom quickly tried to dismiss her nagging worry as she made a desperate attempt to bury her anxiety. 

Unfortunately for your mother, the more she tried to watch IT disappear into oblivion, the more glaring IT became. 

A cold chill soon crept into her bones and she felt herself shivering physically in the air-conditioned store, at the possibility of her son not getting better.

NO NO NO!!!

That must never happen!!!

Her heart cried out fiercely. 

No, she was not going to let herself get sucked into that hopeless quicksand of negative mentality. After all, thousands of others have received miraculous healing from their infirmities, she thought out aloud as she struggled to re-assemble her shattered faith, supposedly the size of a mustard seed.

There is always, always hope, she insisted somewhat stubbornly to herself. No one can take that away from her. 

Not without her permission. 

Clinging on to that frail thread of fragile hope with every fiber in her body, she was adamant to do whatever it takes to keep that hope alive.

 

In Malacca (April 2009)

DOT 170 : CURE

THE FINAL CHAPTER : A SPIRITUAL JOURNEY (Sept 2009 to Jan 2010)

At the Grotto of Our Immaculate Conception, in Lourdes   

Daniel (14+ years old) (Tuesday 22/9/2009) 

Day 13 in Lourdes

NOVENA DAY 5

 

At the bookstore, your mother flipped through several books with keen interest, and briefly read highlighted apparitions of the Beautiful Lady. 

Soon, she found herself somehow discouraged as she eventually learned that even Bernadette, the girl who had seen the Blessed Mother, and had the divine privilege to speak to Her and received several instructions from Her, the main ones being:

"Would You be so kind as to come here every day for the next 15 days?"

"I don't promise You happiness here, but the hereafter ..."

"Go drink from the spring and wash yourself in it ..."

"Tell the Priest to have a chapel built here. People will come here in procession."

"I Am The Immaculate Conception."

... well, even Bernadette herself was never cured of her own ailment, and she had died at the age of 34 years old. 

Whilst thousands of people testified to miraculous cures and unexplained healings at the spring waters (eventhough only 67 were documented and recognized by the Catholic Church after rigorous investigative procedures), Bernadette had remained sickly all her life.

No miracle cure for Bernadette?

No miracle for the 14 year old girl whom the Immaculate Conception had appeared to eighteen times, and spoken to on several occasions? Where would that leave us?

That was the part that deeply troubled your mother.  

 

 Dad took this photo of Justine with the statue of Bernadette on 13/9/2009. 

Your sister would be leaving Lourdes by night train with Grandma 

to catch a flight back to Malaysia the following day. 

Mom was with You in Lourdes Hospital then.

DOT 169 : ROCKS

THE FINAL CHAPTER : A SPIRITUAL JOURNEY (Sept 2009 to Jan 2010)

At the Grotto of Our Immaculate Conception, in Lourdes   

Daniel (14+ years old) (Tuesday 22/9/2009) 

Day 13 in Lourdes

NOVENA DAY 5

 

We stayed at the grotto to say our rosaries, light candles, and spend some quiet time in deep reflection. Dad wheeled You right up to "touch the rocks" where Our Lady was standing. 

Pilgrims young and old, would queue up daily in a long line just to process through the grotto, and it is traditional to touch the rocks, all along the queue right up to directly under the spot where the apparitions of Our Lady had taken place in 1858.

It was easy, we found to communicate out heartfelt thoughts and prayers to the Blessed Mother, because ... well, because She was just standing - right there. 

It was during our daily presence at the sanctuary that You, Dad and Mom gradually developed a deeper and a more intimate relationsip with the Mother of God.

About an hour later, we slowly made our way back to the hotel. Dad and You went to the room to take a rest, while Mom decided to go to the bookstore. 

There were may books about Our Lady of Lourdes and Bernadette Soubirous, the 14 year old pheasant girl who was blessed to see the apparition of "a beautiful lady" eighteen times in a period of five months in the year 1858. 

When Mom first mentioned about Bernadette, and that she was 14 years old when Mother Mary appeared to her, You had exclaimed excitedly,

"Hey Mom, I'm 14 years old too!"

Like as if You were at that privilege age. The age where You were supposed to have a very special connection with Our Lady, Mom thought quietly. 

Your mother replied without hesitation, 

"And that's why Mother Mary loves You so much!"

Touching of the rocks ...

Dad's pushing You in the carriage through the grotto.

Picture taken on 30/9/2009.

DOT 168 : HEAD

THE FINAL CHAPTER : A SPIRITUAL JOURNEY (Sept 2009 to Jan 2010)

At the Grotto of Our Immaculate Conception, in Lourdes   

Daniel (14+ years old) (Tuesday 22/9/2009) 

Day 13 in Lourdes

NOVENA DAY 5

 

"I told Julian I wanted to dip my whole head in today ..."

You said, as Dad was wheeling You out of the bath section. 

Julian was one of the bath's hospitaliers, a volunteer from Australia. 

"That's good, Daniel," Mom replied happily. 

We have been wanting to do that since the first day of Novena, but it was difficult to lower You into the bath when You were in the carriage and not able to raise your head then. 

You had to be lowered into the spring waters with a small stretcher or sometimes, a chair, You had explained the challenge of the past few days.

It was good to see You come out from behind the curtain with your hair damp. You looked cheerful, fresh and all smile-y. 

Dad had approached the volunteer and thanked him, before wheeling You out. The man had cheerfully said to You, 

"We'll see You tomorrow then ..." 

The other hospitaliers had waved to You too, as we were leaving. You were beginning to lay your imprint at the bath station and in the hearts of the people around You. Your parents could see that.

That was your God - given charm although clearly, You were unaware of that.

 

 This photo was taken on 28/9/2009. 

Julian was presenting You a pin. We had bumped into the volunteers 

as we were on the way back to the hotel.

DOT 167 : WHEELCHAIR

THE FINAL CHAPTER : A SPIRITUAL JOURNEY (Sept 2009 to Jan 2010)

At the Grotto of Our Immaculate Conception, in Lourdes   

Daniel (14+ years old) (Tuesday 22/9/2009) 

Day 13 in Lourdes

NOVENA DAY 5

 

When we reached the grotto area, we saw a mighty long queue of people in wheelchairs waiting to get into the bath. There were easily fifty wheelchairs in three rows, with people most of whom were of senior age. 

One of the hospitaliers saw You from afar and waved at us, beckoning us to go right up to the entrance. 

A lady who was pushing an old man in a wheelchair was beside us, and she thought the hospitalier was signalling to them. So there Dad was, pushing You in your wheelchair, and the lady walking right beside Dad, pushing the old man in his, both of you heading towards the entrance, and overtaking the massive long queue that afternoon. 

Mom walked behind Dad.

At the entrance, Dad presented You, and the lady, the old gentleman. The hospitalier was all friendly and compassionate when he saw You, giving You a wide smile.

However, his smile quickly faded as he turned to the old man and the lady. He sternly, strictly and very firmly pointed them back to the end of the queue. 

Mom felt bad as she watched the lady turned the wheelchair around to go back to the queue. She was probably wondering, as she pulled away, why a young boy was chosen to go in before the frail old man.

Your mother was very, very grateful that the hospitalier was kind enough to give You the VIP treatment. People around us who saw what just happened at the entrance would probably not understand, but Our Lady did. She knew exactly what was happening. You were in Her territory. It would have been very tiring for You to wait at least two hours at the back of the line to reach the entrance.

The Queen of Heaven must have steered You right in.

 

 Picture taken on 29/9/2009 when Aunty Diana flew over to visit You.

 

 

AVE MARIA

By Jackie Evancho.

Click on title to view video.